[date Sun, Nov 24, 2013 at 11:02 AM]
Lordy, lordy, this cartoon speaks volumes to me…… (and about me).
Begs the question: was Sisyphus related to Procrastimus? I’ve got both sets of genes workin’ my mojo…..
A Short Treatise Regarding the Average Citizen
Goldfish in a bowl – that’s the first thought that came to my mind. Followed by peals of laughter, enough to bring tears…. So this is the sum and total of humanity, I thought.
What in hell am I talking about? Time for a trip in my “way back machine” to tell this story.
Some years ago when Okanagan Telephone Company was alive, the Engineering Department was located in Vernon. As a young unmarried engineering employee, my time was my own outside work. Whither I went, there I was, with no rationale required. Some of you may remember such carefree days fondly. Or not. No matter……. Here’s the story:
One dark wintry evening there was mischief afoot in our snowbound paradise. Seems a couple of bad boys robbed a convenience store and made their getaway in a big old gas guzzling Chev sedan, hell bent for leather (as the saying goes) on the slippery, snowy streets of Vernon. This was back in the days of snow and cold, when winter came and made itself to home for months on end.
The distraught shopkeeper alerted our local constabulary. They in turn reluctantly put down their donuts, mounted their trusty police cruiser, and proceeded to search the town, a la bloodhound, for the marauding miscreants. Time passed. What ho! The scent! Tally ho! The chase was on……….
I would have loved to be in the cruiser to witness the chase. How fast can a criminal go when it’s snowing, the streets are icy, and you are jacked up on adrenalin plus whatever concoction flowing through your veins that would convince you robbing a convenience store is a good career choice? Rhetoric aside, I know the answer in this case. Too fast.
Perhaps the good guys were gaining. Perhaps the perps were unfamiliar with the quirky side streets of Vernon – there are a few. Perhaps the driver had low skills and high expectations. No matter. While traveling west on 24th Avenue at what must have been a very high speed, the tee intersection 24th makes with 43rd Street came into view and presented a unique set of problems. Oh to have been standing on the corner watching all the cars go by……
Everyone knows I’m not a fan of General Motors products, especially Chevrolet. Not a hatred, more a preference for something better. What followed wasn’t the fault of the old Chev. Even a Ford Galaxy couldn’t have negotiated this tee at that speed. What ensued was pure Hollywoodland slapstick.
The driver of the Chev lost control. The car jumped the curb, crashed through a chain link fence, slid across an open grassy area, ran up the berm at the edge of a huge tank, and continued by breaching the tank top only to land smack in the middle, sinking slowly into the fluid it contained.
The fluid was no ordinary fluid. The tank was no ordinary tank. The chain link fence WAS ordinary, but it bordered something out of the ordinary: the Vernon sewage plant. The tank the hapless criminals “drove their Chevy to the levy” into was one of four used to aerate and settle Vernon’s finest effluent into manageable components. Good thing I wasn’t there. Probably would have died laughing.
I often wonder……….. did the cops put the felons in the back of the cruiser? If so, did they hose them down first? Would Febreze® be up to the task? Did the law officers behave in a “professional” manner, or were they rolling on the ground gasping for breath at the sight of shit covered bad boys trying to escape the sinking car and get out of that poo? Chaucer would have had a hay day with that one down for sure.
Alas, I’ll never know how it went down. I wasn’t there. It happened late at night, and I was home in bed dreaming about designing telephone transport systems. Or whatever.
Hearing the news the next day on the car radio while driving in to work, I thought it’s almost on my way – let’s go take a look.
When I arrived at the scene, a local towing company was lifting the Chev out of the tank, had it over the edge and onto the grass. I don’t think that Chev was ever cleaned up and put back on the road. It smelled pretty good. That is, it smelled very bad. It was covered in a brownish sludge, and filled with the same, leaking out the door sills and off the undercarriage.
Being of an engineering mindset, I thought to look into the aeration tank to see what I could see. Not every day a Chev literally lands in the shit. They had pumped out most of the effluent from the tank to enable the extraction. As I approached the edge there was no visible fluid in the tank. Closer and closer, still nothing to see. Up the berm, to the edge, and I looked down into the tank. There was about a foot and a half of liquid. Filled with thousands of ????
Goldfish in a bowl – that’s the first thought that came to me. When I realized that the thousands of “fish” were condoms, I laughed, and laughed, and laughed some more. Many thoughts followed: “Who in their right mind flushes condoms down the toilet?” “Somebody’s getting laid and it isn’t me.” “I wonder if the mayor will make a speech?” “This is as real as it gets.” “I’ve got to be there for the arraignment of these clowns.” “This brings new meaning to the expression “swimming with the fishes””……………
I think about excellence a lot. I read in the paper and hear on the news and search the Internet for the noteworthy machinations of human endeavor, all the noble acts, the efforts to produce a better society, the advances in technology, and medicine, and science, and understanding this wonderful existence. The search to know never ends. It is very uplifting, and inspiring.
But I never forget that a poor life choice and a short car ride can land you in a world of shit, surrounded by ghosts of better times.
By the way. While staring at the swirling sea of condoms, I didn’t see one real goldfish. So much for the old adage about flushing them…………….
Nothing to say about Rob Ford, or Indians, or indians, or the Shiny Pony, or political corruption, or poor law making unintended consequences, or hockey, or football. Just giving Canada a week off.
UNITED STATES OF AMERICA
I’m not a racist. I don’t know a working definition of “race”. But I AM A CULTURALIST. General physical appearance aside, the behavior of people is a product of their training and indoctrination. On the other hand, as Ron White so succinctly expressed, “You can’t fix stupid”….. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fL6wbsGx9qw . The young black gang “culture” in a large number of American cities have invented a “game” called knockout. An unsuspecting person passing by is assaulted by one of the gang members playing knockout – the objective is to render them unconscious, preferably with one blow. Needless to say, this harmless pastime by these angelic chiluns has grave consequences for the victim, a number of whom have died or been permanently disabled. The main stream media is guilty of obfuscating the trend by misreporting the “facts” in their coverage, if they cover the stories at all. Surprise, surprise! The victims are NEVER BLACK. The following article details some of the history, and what a small number of people are doing about it:
There is a chronicle of this incipient “racial” violence movement written by Colin Flaherty titled “White Girl Bleed a Lot”. He has over 500 incidents documented with links to video footage. I’ve mentioned this book before – it is on my reading list.
By the way, the argument is not poverty makes them do it, or “racism” makes them do it, or lack of privilege makes them do it. If you didn’t watch it above, here is the cause: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fL6wbsGx9qw
MECHANICAL WORLD, NEAT AND SCARY STUFF
NOTE: DO NOT WATCH THIS VIDEO WITHOUT SITTING DOWN! Didier Grams rides a BMW motorcycle for a living. This video is a lap at the Macau GP 2013 race. Hard to watch – he doesn’t stay in the saddle much:
I used to love going fast on a motorcycle. Watching this one lap tired my bum muscles out – I kept clenching my seat. It also gave my heart a rest – I’m sure it stopped beating a few times.
POLITICAL, POLITICIANS, HUMOUR, NUTS STUFF
From Jessica C. –
Caption for the following – “God Bless Moms” –
A graphic comment on the wisdom of John Kerry and the Obambi foreign policy –
An important video about the hidden world of research labs, specifically those using animals to find solutions and cures for human ailments and diseases. Cindy Buckmaster says to those involved stop hiding and stop your silence::
She got my attention when she said to the assembled researchers “you are the reason that a 6 year old with leukemia will live to be 7. You are heroes. Why are you silent?”. Her insistence is that animal research is a necessity to find solutions, and that the public guilt based bias is misplaced. She encourages the researchers to end their silence, because they are partly to blame for allowing the perception to be propagated in the public sphere by the activists.
SCIENCE, TECHNOLOGY, AWESOME STUFF
The advances in digital imagery is staggering. This video shows the granular detail available in a 17Gigapixels digital picture. Incredible! Like having a macro-microscope:
Another web page with the same photo that is interactive:
Think that’s something? Pshaw! Here’s London at 80Gpx:
I couldn’t watch the entire video – really shitty music and jerky zooms, but you get the idea. There is no privacy outdoors. Imagine this technology in the “wrong” hands. Whoops! It already is…..
The truth / facts about solar and wind energy is becoming better known. Are you a fan of solar and wind produced energy? Really? Seems like a freebie….. but how about the argument that it is less harmful to the environment than either solar or wind:
Once more with feeling. The government must stay out of business. The government must stay out of commerce. The government must stay out of R & D. The government must be accountable for “unforeseen consequences”. The politicians must be accountable for their actions. The bureaucrats must be accountable for their actions. A free market is the goal (don’t know if it’s ever attainable, much like a human’s attempt to be “good”). Capitalism as defined by Hayek, Freedman, Sowell et al works. Stop lobbyists from accessing politicians.
GUNS, GUNNERS, GUNNERY
PHILOSOPHY, PHILOSOPHERS, SMART THINKING
Kevin Kelly is a football coach at Pulaski Academy in Little Rock, Arkansas. He uses applied statistics to win football games. He DOES win football games:
Coach Kelly should apply his analytical mind to the “sport” of politics. Who knows what he might come up with? Football is at the same level as chess in Joe M.’s opinion. It has an intellectual complexity over hockey in that the play is in segments (bits / bytes). Each segment can be analyzed for “sanity”, re-played, and re-analyzed. And it is, ad infinitum, by every armchair quarterback, football scout, and coache’s staff.
“Women should not be allowed within fifty feet of a school where boys are taught.” If this statement makes your coffee shoot out yer nose, you’d better read the following article and ponder the essence of what Mr. Reed says.”The Pussification of America” not only coins a word / phrase (if it wasn’t already), it makes very valid points about the “social engineering” of our society through the education of children, identifying whom is affected and effected most ruinously. Fred Reed says in his article that human nature is being intentionally squelched at horrendous cost to male humans specifically, and to society in general:
Joe Mekanic says the core observations in this article are true. Anyone who has raised a boy and a girl, or been around them knows it to be so. Can you “change” someone by outlawing their nature? I think not….. Hysteria leads us nowhere useful.
DJ Drover says “comity” is a word I didn’t know – thanks Mr. Reed. AND I agree with Joe. As for the accusation by Mr. Reed that it is a “feminist plot” of social engineering, it seems a tad complementary to the “feminist movement”. It would assume that they 1. have their “poop in a group”, and 2. know how to implement such a plan. Haven’t seen much evidence for that level of competency from feminists, organized or not. However, if there is such a “conspiracy”, it is being carried out at a much higher, much more powerful, and much more dangerous level than the feminist movement. Be vewwy afwaid Elmer.
RELIGION OF PEACE (ON YOU AND ME)
A 16 year old Moroccan girl was raped. Her attacker was jailed. The family of the rapist proposed the family “honor” be restored by having the rapist marry the victim upon release. WTF? The girl commits suicide, proving she is the only sane person in the two families:
Ann Coulter once (in)famously said –
In view of the article posted in philosophy above, add “and teach them English” to her statement……
Today’s sermon delivered by Christopher Hitchens. Four and one half minutes titled “If you want to be awe inspired”:
The sermon itself is awe inspiring. A two-fer.
I hear the message. I think it has value. However valuable the statement, a spelling mistake is like hitting a concrete wall. Please take the time to check your spelling…..
The weather outside is very nipple-y. I call it “two tee shirt weather”. We are having the cold spell blues. No snow. Minus Cº temperatures. The earth ain’t moving beneath our feet and it’s hard and so is the water. The sun sets around 4:00 p.m. and rises about 9:00 a.m., if it isn’t too cloudy. On reflection, the Clint Eastwood dialog “Do you feel lucky?” makes me ponder…… do I? I feel punked out by the weather AND a yard FULL of acorns and oak leaves. All I’ve got going is on December 21 the days will start getting longer. That’s it. Oh yeah, there’s this –
Joe ( Two Tee) Mekanic
p.s. Ramirez doesn’t give me the shivers –
A repeat because it’s so damn good…. –