[Date: April 13, 2014 at 11:36:47 AM PDT]
Rant on Senior Citizenshipery
I’ve changed teams. I’m a rookie in this game. I have known it’s coming for over 50 years. Knowledge, alas, is not wisdom or intelligence. It certainly isn’t a tactic. Strategically knowledge is helpful or harmful. It depends on the strategist’s use of it, da?
The day before the event I had no idea of the immensely profound change one (more) day would make. As an event it came silently, in the night, leaving no visible trace of passing, no profound realization of change. Not an insidious or evil turning, no “Dorean Gray” moment, nary a blip on the radar of my conscious continuum. When I woke in the morning it was, I thought (and Joe too), another day in Paradise. A word that deserves capitalization if ever a word should.
But, as the great novelist Joseph Heller wrote, SOMETHING HAPPENED.
A new awareness came creeping into my consciousness as the “annumeter” added minutes to this cultural “reset” of personal time measurement (my coinage – meaning the incremental accumulation of time in years).
Every day since I was 14 years old I’ve woken believing I’m 14 years old. Like a perverted re-write of “50 First Dates”, it takes all day to wear me down, tire me out, and provoke an epiphany while brushing my teeth before bedtime – there is a slim chance you might NOT be 14. Every day is little David’s “Ground Hog Day” – rise and shine a young man only to realize the day will prove my age by the next sleep-time, and I’ll be no closer consciously to “solving” the “problem”. Persistence of false memory? Tactical subjectivity? Skewed strategic objectives? Am I missing a key puzzle piece? Quiet in the peanut gallery, please………
So what is the problem? Conversely, if there is a problem, what could it be?
It has to do with harmony. Joe and I agree. Here’s an example:
We (Joe and I) have clear thoughts of running through the woods along the edge of Elliot Lake (Ontario). Thoughts of lightness and speed and agility and endless energy. The wind, the trees, the sunlight, the laughter, the companions, the sounds.
I am President Polyanna. I tried to run across the yard recently. Joe was having none of it. He’s more rational than I, he’s Commissar of What’s Good For Us. Question: what happens when a 250 pound out of shape man-boy with bad knees breaks into a peculiar gait that resembles more a canter with flailing arms and spastic whimpers than a dash of leg thrusting arm pumping fiery breathed rhythm? Well, it’s a wheezing, caroming, unstable cacophony of body parts out of harmony for starters. Danger! Danger, Will Robinson! It is also a severe disconnect in the mental department. The exalted Minister of Memory harrumphed, blathered some tripe along the lines of “with a little exercise, a little practice, it will be as we remember”. What an ass he is. The Supervisor of Corporeal Continuity was more blunt (I think he was conferring with Joe). He said any more shenanigans like that and you’ll trip and fall and won’t be able to get up. Another ass. The Department Head of Get Things Done was dismayed at the performance statistics and immediately started manipulating the data to render the stench more palatable. Another dumbass. It certainly didn’t bring back a joy of running, or confirm running was still in the playbook.
The harmony of memory and action, of apogee and reality, is no longer sweet music; it is cacophony. The little train who could is in the round house.
This juxtaposition of harmony and reality has many facets. So far, it’s a laugh riot. Who would have thought I’d make it this far?
Some of the funner (check it out – it’s in the dictionary) incidents lately –
There are seniors discounts! I’m so new to the game that I forget to ask. Note to selves – remember to ask for senior’s discount. –
When I look in the mirror I realize the above cartoon applies to me…………
In B.C. seniors get discounts for the amazing accomplishment of getting old! I’m not kidding! All I had to do was stay alive long enough and it all comes right to your door (figuratively speaking so far for me). Here are some of the senior discounts I’ve received:
- ICBC (the socialist insurance company) offers a 25% discount for seniors (over 65). I saved more than a Geico second per dollar on my vehicle insurance. Of course, you can’t use the vehicle for work, only pleasure. If work brings you pleasure it is unclear.
- B.C. tax registry (the socialist land tax department) offers a further discount (above the “home owner’s discount) for seniors turning 65 and older in the current tax year. Oh lordy, the financial pleasure of Old Age®!
- TELUS offers a senior cell phone. I haven’t researched this avenue because my current cell phone has large enough numbers for me to see, and my plan is a “grandfathered” contract that costs $15.00 per month. That’s right, $15.00 Cdn. Of course, if you actually USE the cell phone, the cost rises dramatically. By dramatically I’m talking nose bleed pass out heart stopping high cost charges. But what the hell, I can join the crowd in the wireless wonderland….. I only use it when I need to make a call. I shut it off otherwise.
As a Canadian citizen with over 50 years of contributions (coerced I might add) to various political coercions of the past, I am eligible to receive CPP and OAS. Hallelujah Jesus! I got a raise………….
Another positive came from an unexpected source – the bank! My mortgage is due in October this year. After a recent shouting match with them about banking records (Scotiabank electronic records of your banking activities are only retrievable for the 18 months previous to current – if you need records older they charge $5.00 Cdn per month to print them), I threatened to renew my mortgage with a competitor. An idle threat perhaps. I call my new “senior personal banking officer” Two Trees. She is a lovely woman in her late 20’s or early 30’s named Ashley Oakes, at the main Scotia branch downtown Vernon. I recommend her. My recommendation is for her only, and not forthcoming for Scotiabank. She contacted me about early renewal of my mortgage to take advantage of a low rate – 2.9%. It isn’t the lowest but there were no penalties or surcharges for early renewal so I signed on the bottom line.
What has this to do with senior discounts? Well, the mortgage renewal was a re-writing of the terms because we increased the payments and changed some details. Because I am over 65, and it was a “new” mortgage, mortgage life insurance is no longer available through the bank. If I die before the mortgage term is up, the outstanding balance is due. Conversely, they don’t insist there be mortgage insurance. I saved $100 a month! The perks just keep a comin’!
This is the first time in my adult life I’m worth more alive than dead.
Now, everyday I wake feeling 14 years old. When I start moving the reality starts creeping (me out). However, all I’ve got to do is stay alive and I get paid for it!
If this had only happened when I was 14 years old.
A few cartoons for those over 65. All others DON’T LOOK! IT MAY ALTER YOUR WELTANSCHAUUNG (in a way you find uncomfortable). –
The CBC is not my choice of entertainment, information, or news. Neither radio or television CBC is divorced from progressive ideology and leftist objectives. Too bad for me I choose differently. My little pea brain doesn’t accept that the CBC can “compete” with private entities while accepting government tax dollars to float their boat. Either get the CBC off of the government teat and let it live or die in the marketplace, or prohibit the CBC from “competing” with government backing (aka the people’s tax money). Joe and I heartily approve of the following news:
Reiteration – I and Joe are not adverse to the CBC’s existence or programing or political leanings. We simply don’t watch or listen. I and Joe ARE adverse to the CBC getting any of my tax dollars to keep their boat afloat. From the above article it is evident there is a hole in the boat. Loved the following comment – “The point was PBS get far less from the US Govt….How does CTV,Global and City make money with such a small market?? and the CBC lose $1.1 billion a year?” Good point. How does they do dat?
Jim Flaherty, the best finance minister Canada has seen in 50 years, died unexpectedly on Thursday, April 10. A great example of “fightin’ Irish” Canadian style – Pit Bull tenacity, broad intelligence, depth of knowledge, compassion, and humor. Canada will miss him. R.I.P. Mr. Flaherty:
Alberta School Woes
Alberta students have placed as high as 4th in the world re: International PISA testing. Accredited to Mr. Stuart Wachowicz, the architect of “core knowledge” as an approach to educating. Mr. Wachowicz speaks out about the changes being implemented to the Alberta school curriculum. He isn’t a fan:
Joe is a better educator than I, and we both are amateurs. Our opinion is that “Constructivism” as a teaching philosophy is never going to produce the wholesale population wide results expected. Due entirely to the base nature of the human animal. If it must be adopted, we (Joe and I) suggest only the “arts” studies are the focus. The hard curriculum of math, science, physics, biology, et cetera cannot afford the excess time and investment required to ensure students obtain a quality education if “discovery learning” is employed. Seems Mr. Wachowicz has a valid argument; a solid knowledge base supplies the tools required for “discovery learning”.
Another observation is very few positive changes come about if they are wholesale and global. Incremental change is the ticket, albeit it ain’t glamorous, exciting, or daring. We are talking about the future success of Canadian children aren’t we? They are not educational “cannon fodder”……
UNITED STATES OF AMERICA
Heavy Handed Feds
There is a rancher in Nevada named Cliven Bundy and his family are having their constitutional rights trampled by armed Federal agents. The Feds have confiscated his cattle and assaulted members of his family. Over grazing rights on public land. Who is right and who is wrong is moot at this point. The State of Nevada is remiss in asserting its legal authority to halt the Federal actions. The State may be liable. And the Feds. Time to “lawyer up” and head ’em out. It ain’t pretty. It may not be right. One hundred years of history is a good argument.
Update: Seems like the people of Nevada have more balls than the Governor. They have armed themselves and stand ready to revolt. It worked. The BLM has backed down. How will Obambi’s minions seek revenge?:
“Brent Mackelprang, 58, a cattle rancher from Arizona, said the government’s decision to seize Bundy’s cattle in the name of protecting “the supposedly endangered” desert tortoises, was a mere excuse “to go in and grab land from the people,” including Bundy, who’s long claimed that the land belongs to his family and the state of Nevada — “certainly not to the federal government.”
Mackleprang said the government’s conservation efforts are “nothing but a lie.”
“It’s not about the turtle, or the cactus or the spotted owl. This is all about the federal government overstepping its bounds like it always does and thinking it owns the world,” Mackleprang said. “Well, we’re here to say that it doesn’t. But if you’re a rancher and you’re living on the Colorado Plateau, then you’re going to need some luck to make a living.””…….
…….“All of the candidates questioned the agencies’ motives and proposed that solar energy stations and oil fracking were likely reasons for the federal government to make a “land-grab.””
Go Nevada folks, go!
Mentally Retarded Administration
Remember when the Obambimeister reassigned NASA’s strategic objective? To abandon space as a top priority and make nice with the Muslims. What a retard leading a bunch of retards.
Seems like events in the Ukraine with Russia have reassigned NASA a new strategic direction. They will suspend all contract with Russia except for the contact they don’t suspend. That a boy Obambi! That’ll teach those mean old Russians:
Barrack Obama is a disgrace to the country and the office. His minions are as mentally disturbed as he is, which is plenty. What a laughing stock. What a crime.
POLITICS, POLITICIANS, WACKJOBBERY, HUMOROUS, STUPID
Texas has the right idea –
The latest idiocy from the feminist side of the ledger is shunning the word “bossy”. The Bluebird of Bitterness has a few thoughts to share:
I and Joe don’t find fault with the arguments or observations cataloged in the opinion piece. Nor with the tone. It seems to us that an awfully large number of children are raising themselves in the absence of sound parenting, leaving them vulnerable to politically driven ideologies that are extreme or fringe or MINORITY based.
Matt Walsh has an insightful perspective on the issue:
As Mr. Walsh states, “This is a maneuver right out of page 1 in the Progressive Playbook. It’s a very simple play, really……..It goes like this: make things up.”
The kidnap and perversion of words in our language is another method of alienating members of civil society. Joe and I remember an earlier time when there was no “double entendre” (or treble, or quadruple) warning about using words that had held the same meaning for centuries. Why does this happen? The distillation of why? leaves a few precipitates in the beaker: tribalism, political coercion, changing cultural norms, advancements in science and technology are examples. Some are good, some are bad, some are neutral. Mr. Walsh sums it nicely by describing four behaviors he finds most irritating “on Earth”:
The modern leftist obsession with manipulating language, subjectivizing words, arbitrarily declaring certain terms to be offensive/racist/sexist/homophobic, and then working to ban them, stigmatize them, and bully everyone else into adopting their interpretations of these newly vulgar phrases.
-The modern leftist obsession with creating cultural problems where they don’t exist, ignoring them where they do, and using completely fabricated statistical data to steer the conversation in their favor.
-The modern leftist obsession with encouraging self-esteem in our kids even to the point of embracing and excusing arrogance and self-absorption.
Joe and I like certain ventriloquists, but certainly agree with the other three points. We are hyper sensitive about language abuse. Perhaps we can get a job with the language police in Quebec…………
GUNS, GUNNERS, GUNNERY
PHILOSOPHY, PHILOSOPHERS, SMART THINKING
Mark Steyn (Canadian polemist) on multiculturalism:
Ayaan Hirsi Ali (Somali born American ex Muslim human rights activist) on cultural relativism:
RELIGION OF PEACE (ON ALL OF US)
History of Islam
William J. Federer (American historian) gives an history lesson on Islam titled “What the West Needs to Know About Islam”. Tune up your hearing. This man talks fast and thinks faster.:
This video is a must see. Islam is a cunning devious and dangerous cult, thinly veiled as a “religion”. Did you know that every slave ever brought to the Americas was purchased at a Muslim slave market? That slavery in the Muslim world is more prevalent than at any time in history? Mr. Federer gives historic highlights to explain the Muslim phenomenon. His book and DVD are on my “must read” (and see) list. Tell me about cultural relativism again……
Quote: “Multiculturalism is the Aids virus of Western civilization.”
Genocidal Islam Evil Pakistan
This one takes the halal cake. A crippled man and his illiterate wife who have reported loosing their cell phones are sentenced to death for blasphemy for texting on phones they no longer possessed. Tell me again about the religion of peace. I’m uneasy with that description:
Oh yeah, a note in passing. They are Christians. Keep moving folks. Nothing to see here.
Sam Harris on science and atheism:
Take a Sunday morning and listen. Not as time consuming as church and a bunch more sane…..
WEATHER (OR NOT)
Finally! Spring has sprung. The grass is riz. Time for outdoor activities. The last week was cloudy, sunny, rainy, windy, cold (but not freezing) at night, cool, and warm. Always changing, never boring, sometimes greatly pleasing. Right on time the daffodildos have emerged to display their bright yellow spring color. A snapshot this a.m. starring the aforementioned flowers and my left thumb. What a snap shootist!
Time to go outside and clean up the detritus of winter…. Or is it the afterbirth of Spring? Us old timers get confused sometimes…..
Joe (Strike One) Mekanic
p.s. Ramirez bats 1.000 –